By Matt
I've been living a refreshed life the past three weeks, and it feels great. I wish I could say what changed, but I can't quite pinpoint it yet. Honestly, the right song plays, I tear up, and smile. The best description at the time is I kind of feel like the Beast at the end of the 1991 animated classic. The curse has been lifted, and I'm in the middle of an inspiring transformation, that's left me a bit dumbfounded. (Anyone else think the Prince he reverts to is incredibly bland and that his previously beastly appearance is much more aesthetically pleasing?) I'm not so foolish as to think the spell has been broken in my situation, but I do believe that with consistent mindfulness, an open acceptance of circumstance, and a rational basis of reaction, that maybe I can walk a clearer and more beautiful path. So I figured I'd share what's in my therapeutic quiver lately. These are a few of the items that have been helping me cope and fill the holes of my previous ritualistic idleness.
Oh Mama. The coffee. I need my bean man. Simple as that. Luckily for my fight against fatness, I've always taken it black. Since Julie is strictly a tea in the morning type, I had a small coffeemaker of the plug in variety. But bleh. Smaller means it needed to be cleaned more often, and the flavor lost all uniqueness. I was recommended the Chemex by a former Crossfit coach, and I've found it to be just what I need. It's a simple design, but with a purpose in mind. The Chemex allows for your coffee to bloom, the slow pour reveals the uniqueness of flavor, and it all comes without calcification. I used to acquire residue in my coffee cup, but the Chemex erased that. It's actually perfect therapy first thing in the morning. I engage in a process, and I'm rewarded with perfect coffee and an immediate sense of a mindful task accomplished. Plus part of the process is the required slow deliberate pour, a gentle reminder of the patience required for the rest of my day. It sounds corny but it reminds me that I can't control the events of the day forthcoming, but I can absolutely control my reaction to those events. Crucial.
Jim's Birdacious Bark Butter from Wild Birds Unlimited
When we moved to Williamsburg, we chose to sacrifice some square footage in order for the whole unique stay at home Dad concept we wanted to adopt. We left a beautiful and substantial perennial garden behind in Gibsonville, NC. Our current house allows for one tree in the front and one in the back. That's not a lot, but the front yard dogwood is brilliant when it blooms. We are also deep in the woods here, and it's an amazing sanctuary for a diverse assortment of birds. Each morning, I've been going outside and spreading the Bark Butter all over the limbs, and the birds have made that dogwood more popular than the Peach Pit after dark. At least twice a day I have to replenish the goods, but we get to enjoy seeing woodpeckers, cardinals, bluebirds, titmouses, yellow rumped warblers, house finches, chickadees, starlings (black from far away, but brilliantly colored up close, a true introvert favorite), sparrows, robins, towhees and juncos. I have a small murder of crows that visit across the street to feast on peanuts. They fight with the squirrels. Oh the squirrels. But again, they are an exercise in mindful patience. I try to keep them away from the birds and the dogwood, but I don't resent them. Instead I appreciate their tenacity. It's hilarious, and I'm THIS close to one of them sitting beside me and eating the baking walnuts I steal from the freezer (I'm sure Julie will never figure this out.)
Teas and LaCroix
No soda for the past three weeks as well! I don't know how I flipped that switch. Being a North Carolina boy, I had sweet tea in a bottle, and Sun Drop is still the most delicious elixir on Earth. I've been able to cope without them though. Hot tea is fun, and a nice break from all the water I drink now (so MUCH water). I've become quite fond of the combination of ginger and turmeric, maybe twice a day. I've also gone LaCroix LaCrazy. Although my favorite by far is just the plain version.
Reads and Music
Filling the holes of the previous lifestyle can be a challenge, but that's a positive. I've filled my time with the writing I'm doing here, reading for inspiration, and I've abandoned TV except for Wrestling. (OH Yeah! Yessir. Pro Wrestling. And of course I'm gonna write a detailed, opinionated, insightful post about that modern day Shakespeare that requires a squared circle and men in tights). I've been reading Thomas Merton's The Seven Storey Mountain to decipher what it is that has called to me, Tom Robbin's Tibetan Peach Pie to validate my whimsical stream of consciousness biographical narrative, and Rational Steps to Quitting Alcohol from Albert Ellis and Emmett Velteen to gain insight into Rational Emotive Theory. It's helped me to identify patterns of negativity and self-defeat, and it explains how to address those moments with a bit of rationality and stoicism. It was recommended by a friend and it's been a revelation.
CBD tinctures
I gave these a try towards the end of 2018, and the regular use of these tinctures have paralleled this whole transformative process of mine. Is it placebo? Perhaps coincidence? I guess we need to have more research to find all that out. But right now, it's working for me. I have less anxiety, a more consistent mood, more patience, and renewed focus. Why wouldn't I keep doing what works for me? Currently my two favorites have been Keen Private Reserve and Lazarus Naturals High Potency full spectrum.
Exercise and diet
I've been maintaining the 4:3 intermittent fast type of lifestyle and so far so good. I eat what I want one day, which is high protein, lots of vegetables, some cheese, and no desserts or sweets or grains. The next day is a full fast. I've noticed that my sinuses have been much improved, no midday and evening headaches as I had previously, and my energy is more stable and consistent. I like how that feels. It helps in my focus, and the fear of fasting days is just silly. I really do think we've been fed a steady diet of bunk about food pyramids, the dangers of fat, the concept of essential grains, and portion control. I've also incorporated a food log into my daily routine. At this point, it is a bit unrefined in terms of specific calories and serving sizes, but it's a great way to ensure accountability and consistency. One day, just document EVERYTHING you shove down your pie hole. You'll be amazed. A written log lets you see what works, when it works, and when it doesn't.
These bad bois. My kettlebells. I was an early disciple of Crossfit on the East Coast, but as it increased in popularity, my introverted nature began to eschew from it. At the same time, we had two kids in twenty months, and my time became their time. I've become what those in the medical profession refer to as "fat." That's okay though. The girls are capable now, and I'm able to reclaim my time. I have time to run on the treadmill and shoot basketball at the Y, take evening walks in the woods now that we've had the time change, and I have a C2 rower in the garage for rainy days or morning cardio. I'm hoping to begin yoga this spring at the Y and see where that goes. But for now, here in the house I have my kettlebells. Maybe a few random Turkish Get Ups in the living room, a few sets of snatches or cleans in between folding laundry, goblet squats during commercial breaks of Monday Night Raw. I love kettlebells. Learn from someone certified, and you'll find them to be great all around tools for strength, cardio, joint mobility, and flexibility.
The last part of my health and exercise is the most important. SLEEP. I no longer nurse a few beers and stay awake until midnight ruminating in regret only to disrupt my essential REM cycle. I go to bed when I'm tired! What a novel concept! Julie finds my ability to fall asleep remarkable. From the moment I say I'm going to bed to actually being asleep is no longer than ten minutes at most. I brush my teeth, take my Armour, and I'm all Z's in three minutes. Pure, healthy, eight plus hours of sleep. Look into Rhonda Patrick @foundmyfitness on the huge impact proper sleep has on your brain, the aging process, and your current mental state.
So there you go! I'm not suffering. I'm flourishing! I'm establishing a new normal, finding what works and doesn't, exploring my new world, arming myself with tools to ensure a more consistent, healthy, noble path. It's a journey that is still in its infancy, but that's what makes it so fun! Remember being young, exploring the woods, searching under every rock? Remember the fun in that combination of fearlessness and innocence? That's sort of how my days have been feeling lately. Maybe it's seratonin, maybe it's magic, maybe it's just the rush of accountability. Whatever it is, I urge you to grab a nice stick, and come find me here in these woods. It's beautiful right now. Late spring, before it gets too hot, before the poison oak takes over, the bees are still lazily figuring out their logistics, the trees are green again, and you can lay on your back in the grass, feel the sun warm your soul, and watch the breeze sway the trees. Pull up a patch of green beside me, won't you?
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